I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Just high enough for therapy.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Terrible idea I love it
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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