I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
