No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize