I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Randomize
