she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Randomize
