carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
The best revenge is premature balding
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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