when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Who wears a wallet chain?!
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize