Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Randomize
