U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Randomize
