He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize