butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
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