Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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