Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
