Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
