We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Randomize