She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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