I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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