so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
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