So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize