Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize
