i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
