party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
