I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
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