no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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