She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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