whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Randomize
