Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
