If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize