dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
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