I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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