god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
More tranny stories later!
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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