I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Randomize
