Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
