I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Randomize
