1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
