So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
