I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
