you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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