i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
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