i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
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