I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
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