Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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