Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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