he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
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