Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
