i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Alive.
So much puke
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize
