We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Randomize
