do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
