There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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