I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
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